A Little Boy Who Always Dream High

Hi readers! It's been long time since my last post on last month. I know you miss me and can't wait to read my next story. Story! Yes, that's what i want to share in this article. Since this blog title is "My Life" so i want to share my life story so far. I know i'm still too young to talk about this. I'm not 80, 70 years old man, I'm just 21 years old. But, who cares? Everyone has their own story life and free to share no matter how old they are. 

Anyway, I hope my life story can inspire readers like you. I don't need good or bad impression from my readers. I just want them understand that this man was just a little boy who always dream high. If my story can inspire you, i'll be happy.

So, Let's Start!

Well, as other baby born, I was happy baby who born with kind family and in kind society. My parents named me Audi Rahmantio. 'Audi' in Latin language means listen, 'Rahman' from Arabic language means "The most merciful" and "Tio" from African language means "A Present From God". So, 'Audi Rahmantio' means a present from God who always spread love to other and will be good listener. That's how i define my name.

My parents send me to Islamic school since kindergarten and i studied in the same Islamic Education Institution until Senior High School. No much story from that time. There's good time and bad time in my childhood. 

6-12 years old

Based on graph that i write above, 6-12 years old was elementary school period. No much story. I wasn't good in study since elementary school. I always get bad grade and always be fail students candidate (fortunately, i passed). My classmates thought me I was weird boy because i have high imagination and always act based on my imagination. And also, I was crybaby boy. That's why they happy to bully me because they like see me crying.

My teacher also label me as troublesome student because my grades are always bad. I only good at Islam class and Al-Qur'an class. I don't know if this is true or not, but based what i hear and i studied, in Indonesia's school, grade is everything. If you have high grade then you are smart. If not, then you are considered as stupid. That's the phrase that i know. Correct me if i'm wrong.

Anyway, in the class, if there's group work, i always the one who couldn't do anything. Especially art class who have a lot of group work, I always bring a wrong tools or forget or i couldn't do anything because i'm not good at drawing and painting, so no one believe me and they ignore me.

Thus, my classmates really love to bully me because i wasn't good at study and i was crybaby so that they happy to see me angry and crying, and label me as a weak boy. Of course, there's no girls who want to close with me because of that.

However, I want to show that i have skill that i can showoff. I want to recognized by others, praised by my parents and children, and get applause from everyone. That's why i join new circle at that time, Marching band circle.

However, I was too terrible to play drum and my instructor ask me to just play cymbals. People in my circle and my friends said to me that i was like monkey in the circus who play cymbals. But, I show that with only cymbals, I can make Marching band instrument lively.

Not only that, I'm good at listening to other instrument such as drum and bass. By listening, I know how to play it and i show to my friends and instructors that i could play bass. After that, i always most needed member to substitute bass players who getting tired. Then, i change my position into bass players. My instructor said to me i did well especially in the biggest stage in Jakarta Fair 2004. After that, everyone start to recognize me and consider me as generalist member who can play any instrument.

This is when i play cymbals

And this is when i play big bass

Even many people in my school often bullying me, but i still have best friends who always cheer to me and stick with me. Until today, we still have good relationship.

12-15 Years Old

This is about my junior high school life. Since i enroll in the same school with same institution, so a lot of former my classmates in elementary school, especially who like bullying me, enroll this school too (because it's easy to enroll to the same institution).

Well, i have bad image in their mind (as weak and bullied boy), so they did it again, and students who enroll from other school follow them. That's what happen in my 1st year. Nothing's good! They call me with bad name.

Again, I join performance circle, called Marawis circle (Indonesia traditional music). Same reason, I want to be praised by other, recognized by other, and show that i can do something. When the first time i performed, they laughing to me and insult me with bad words. But after see me perform in every school events, they stop doing that (at least when i performing).

However, my 2nd and 3rd year life in junior high school was fantastic. I started love watching football since World Cup 2006, and by my new hobby, I could make conversation with people who bully me because they love football too and they always ask me new update from football. Since then, little by little, they stop bullying me.

Not only that, I have a group of best friends who always talking about funny things after school in school cafeteria. I played drum in my band for art class from 2nd and 3rd year. I had good relationship with students who play band with me.

Until today, when i go back to Indonesia, I always have reunion with my junior high school friends because they are the best friends ever.

15-18 Years Old

Well, I don't want talk to much in my senior high school life. Many people say, senior high school is the best time. No for me! IT'S WORST TIME! Why? Most of people in my senior high school, students, senior, circle members, even teachers were bullied me. I consider bully because they treat me unfair, abusing me, and destroy my pride.

I will tell one stories! First, there's "high class people" group in my school who feel like they rule the schools. So everyone shouldn't make trouble with them. Even they bully you, you'd better not countering them because they will make your life harder.

I had girlfriend when i was 1st and 2nd year. I didn't want to blame her for everything happen to me. But the fact is, she was one of the bully object when she was junior high school, and the people who bully her, enroll to same school with her, with me, in the same institution. Also, people who bullied me in junior high school also enroll in the same school with me.

Anyway, they insult my gf and myself. I tried to be patient, even they said a very very bad words. But there's moment that i couldn't forgive them from what they said. So, i shouting to the girl who really like bully me and gf with the word "b***h" in front of her face. Then, after school ends, she called her groups, and bring me in school corridor, and SLAP MY FACE WITH SAYING BAD WORDS! Not only that! They write a lot of bad words in my bag. Everyone could see that including seniors. And THEY LAUGH! Why? Because they love see "lower class students" bullied by "high class students". I lost my self-esteem! It's first time that a group of people destroy my self-esteem in the public place in my school.

Well actually, there's a lot of bad stories in my senior high school life but i won't share in here because it's not good for read. I don't why i choose that school. Because at that time my parents want me to school in the same institution because my brother and sister also school in there. Because my teachers and friends suggest me to go there. It's not my own decision! I couldn't lie that i regret to go there. But i have to live without regret. Things happen for its reason! So, at least, i know the feeling of bullied, betrayed, and abused by people.

  18-21 Years Old (Now)

I am happy finally i could graduate from my high school. It's hell for me! Then it's time to looking for university. When i was 11 years old, I told my parents that I will go out from Indonesia and study abroad. They thought it's child dream because i saw my brother went to study abroad and then i want to follow him. No! It's because i will not be anyone in Indonesia. Indonesia education system doesn't match with me anymore and i will not grow up if i still living in Indonesia society. That's the reason why i go abroad.

Then, I found Ritsumeikan Asia Pacific University (APU). The school concept was different from any other college around the world. Before finding APU, I searched for Europe, Singapore, and Australia college. But, too expensive, demanding with studies, and hard to get additional scholarship. But APU is different. They have tuition reduction, chance to get additional scholarship, and easy to get part-time job.

That's my first reason why i choose APU. But from what my senior says, APU is wonderful place for living in multicultural environment. They said, APU is small world because a lot of people who come from many different countries around the world study together in one small place on the top of mountain. And APU is not really strict with study, and i have a lot of chance to perform in circle or multicultural week event. From that story, I decide to choose APU as the only one university that i really want to go. Fortunately, my parents are supporting my decision.

In the 1st and 2nd years in APU, actually, I struggled with living in multicultural environment. I am still "too Indonesian" because i living in the society who always have same idea and religious people (Islam). So, even i share AP house rooms and apartment with Japanese people, having Japanese girlfriend at that time, and hanging out with foreign students, i still have lack of understanding in living in multicultural environment. That's also the reason why i broke up with my Japanese girlfriend.

But, I am sure that I didn't a wrong decision to choose APU. Even I struggling, but no one bully me, on the contrary, everyone help me. Even i don't have close relationship with my 2nd family which is APU INA batch 24-25, but they still recognize me as APU INA batch 24-25 member. That's what i didn't get in my school life in Indonesia. Everyone smile and greet me in campus. No more bully!

I also had a lot of opportunity to perform in many stages with different roles. Before coming to APU, i never dance Indonesia dance, playing drama, playing percussion. But, I am glad that everyone give me chance and trust to perform especially in Indonesian week. They give me chance to feel proud as Indonesian, as Indonesian Week core members, and as a performer. A lot of thanks to APU INA.

I start to love the stage since coming to APU. Still, when the first time i perform in here, I still want to get praised and recognized by other. But now it's different! Stage and audiences applause is what my life wonderful.

Also, i joined student organization in APU called Global Admission Student Staff (GASS). I used to be nervous when i said my opinion in front of people. But they want to listen to me. They didn't abuse my opinion. They respect and keep listen to me. That's why i love them. Because before coming to APU, no one want to listen to me. Everyone think that my opinion is not worth to listen because i considered as troublesome student in the school. But, that's not happen in APU!

Coming to APU is the best decision in my life. It change my life and grow me up. I love living in multicultural environment like APU. It teach me how to respect differences and accepting people's good and bad side. My life is more colorful since i come to APU.

Since come to APU, I also found my dream and my life's goal. My dream is:

"To be a gentleman who can spread a love to people around me and around the world"

And also, I have vision that:

"Working not only for money but to contribute to parent society (Indonesia) and host society (the country that i am living) with valuable work"

My dream and vision are my guideline in my life. I finally realize this after all what happen in my life. I also want to create another APU environment outside there because i see world peace in APU.

What i need to do is to be stronger, both mentally and physically. I realize that i have a lot of weakness but i won't suffer. I always remember this:

"Things happen for its reason. Whether it's good or bad, it will guide me to be stronger man"

So, if there's bad moment happen to me again, it means that i have a new lesson for my life.

I have to thank to God for give me good life so far. My life might be a dream for some people out there who suffer with war and poetry. I have kind family who always in my side whatever my condition. I never suffer with broken home problem. I have a lot of best friends in my junior and senior high school even it's hard time for me. I have opportunity to enroll to wonderful university like APU and meet a lot of wonderful people who help me grow up. I am the one who lucky to have good life so far. I know many people outside there desperate to have a good life like me. That's why i always tried to gratitude with what i have now and not complain if problem comes.

Well, I know you must be headache to read my life story, but i hope this will give you inspiration. I don't know what kind of inspiration but it can be anything. As long as it give you a positive energy, I will be happy!